Losing George Michael – My First Love

You Have Been Loved

A beautiful man, a talented singer songwriter, George Michael was the superstar who showed his humanity to the world.

Initially we fell in love with George because he was sexy and fun and had a rebellious side to his music.  Then with the release of Careless Whisper we fell in love with his vulnerability and his incredible voice.

George went from having “Soul on the Dole”, to the sophistication of Careless Whisper which incorporated sweeping views of Miami, five star hotels. private jets, sports cars, luxury yachts and glamorous women (no offence Pepsi and Shirley).

Everyone loved him and everyone wanted him. From those of us girls and women who emphatically denied any notion that George Michael was gay, to the entire gay community who ‘told us so’ when he came out in a way in which only George could.

Waiting For The Day

My obsession with George Michael began when I was 11.  I ripped a picture of George out of my Smash Hits magazine and placed it sideways on the wall next to my bed.  When I woke up in the morning I would be looking at him as if he was lying next to me.

I had read that his Mum lived in Coldharbour Lane, Bushey in Hertfordshire. I used to beg my relatives to drive me there so that I could wait and see if George Michael turned up.  I found out the local dialling code for Bushey and would spend hours in the phone box with my friend just trying different combinations of numbers in the hope that we would get lucky enough to get George’s Mum’s house. When the phone was answered I would ask “Is George there please?”. We were convinced we would get lucky one day. We didn’t.

Another time, Wham were playing a few dates at Wembley Arena.  I rang the box office and asked to speak to George. I said I was his sister and I needed to speak to him.  They politely told me they were not able to put me through but would pass on the message.

Then when videos first came out, I saved up my pocket money for weeks to buy the Make It Big video.  I was so proud to own it, despite not having a video player to watch it on.

Heal The Pain

I wanted to write this post about George Michael because I needed to pay my tribute to him. I know there are millions of others that are feeling the same way today.  Those of us who have been lifelong fans of his are probably agree that we wished we could have let George know how much he meant to us individually. I wished he had known that he has been with me through the most important years of my life. Puberty, adolescence, finding love, making love and breaking up. Days when you need uplifting and you dance in your room to Outside or Flawless. When you are at a club or a party and you’ve been playing it cool and acting sophisticated all evening, then you hear “da da da Jitterbug…”. You grab the nearest poor unsuspecting guest to you and head to the dancefloor mowing down anyone who dares get in your way. Or when you hear Wham Rap and you and your brainwashed teenage daughter proudly recite the rap word for word.

It ain’t no joy for an uptown boy whose teacher has told him……

Goodbye

What can really be said to make this tragic loss any less painful? Nothing. But we can share our love for George and unite as a community. He was our brother, he was there for us throughout our darkest and happiest moments. I hope he knows what a massive contribution he made to our lives and those around us. George you have been loved, you will always be loved and you will always be in our hearts and an integral part of our lives. You live on in us. xxxx

WE WILL LOVE YOU ‘TILL THE END OF TIME………

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